Any nation that wears bean sprouts in its hair can’t be all bad . . .
My New York Times today had this fruitful headline:
And I quote: Across China, grown-ups are sporting plastic decorations on their heads in the shape of vegetables, fruit and flowers. When the trend started a few months ago, it was usually just a humble bean sprout clipped to the hair . . . . . But as the fad ramped up, especially during the current National Day holiday week when Beijing fills with visitors, it has escalated and diversified to include a riot of plastic vegetation. Now heads are bristling with clover, sunflowers, chrysanthemums, lavender, mushrooms, chilies, cherries, gourds and pine trees.
Slate Magazine is also featuring a photo album of Chinese wearing little green thingies that make them look like a vegan version of My Favorite Martian.
What’s going on here?
One minute the Chinese are hacking our brains out and building islands in the South China Sea so their stinking battleships can butt heads with our own fleet, and the next thing you know they are walking around balancing daffodils on their noggins.
Is this some kind of distraction, some misdirection or hocus pocus on the part of Xi Jinping?
I dunno . . .
Even CNN is running (or maybe plowing) with the story, and those people are hard to fool:
Zhou Delai, a vendor holding a tray full of clips, told CNN the trend started in Beijing about two weeks ago. He says he sells 200 clips every three to four hours.
“I have no idea who initiated the trend,” he said. “I stocked clips because so many people had wore them.”
Zhang sells two clips for less than $1. He said it was a cheap price to pay for joy.
“You only need to spend 5 yuan ($0.79) for fun!”
Of course, we Americans had the whole idea first.
Remember Flower Power?
It just didn’t go to our heads . . .
Those wily Chinese vendors have come up with a new tear;
sprouts and twigs and seedlings stuck into the people’s folk’s hair.
Strolling down the alley in Beijing or old Shanghai,
a girl sporting a corn patch you are bound to often spy.
In the office you are treated somewhat like a felon
if you come to work without a hat of bitter melon.
No one can explain this craze for botanical headgear.
(Perhaps it means the Second Coming of dear Mao is near!)
I understand the punishment for crimes and misdemeanors
is now to have your garden yanked, replaced with Ball Park weiners.