From the Wall Street Journal:
“The European Organization for Nuclear Research, or CERN, is gearing up for another run at smashing particles together to unlock the secrets of the universe.
That means anticipating a new round of conspiracy theories that its real aim is to blast open a gateway for apocalyptic demons.”
Mad scientists have given us so many useful things,
from zombies to slick Teflon to a view of Saturn’s rings.
We ought to treat them kindly and not burn their castles down,
or greet their noble ventures with a pitchfork and a frown.
So what if they develop portals to another sphere?
It might just be a land of peace (or maybe have free beer!)
They oughta form a union, those mad eggheads on a spree,
to strike for better Igors and a quicker apogee.
Now if you really want to see experiments insane
just go and visit Congress, where the thinking is chow mein.