The office printer


Torquemada must have known that he could vent his spleen

on his screaming victims with an office print machine.

Caligula the Emperor of Rome in it’s decay

sent the Christians weeping to make copies ev’ry day.

And Fu Manchu did fiendishly conceive a simple toner

that turned a man into a soiled and fumble-fingered moaner.

But now the worm has turned; a paperless new day has dawned,

and office workers ev’rywhere have formed a steely bond

to kill the office printer in a massive demonstration

that includes cruel baseball bats and defenestration.

Clerks around the world rejoice cuz they are on cloud nine

(at least until computers go completely off the line)

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